never like this

When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.”
When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. 
“Where have you laid him?” he asked. “Come and see, Lord,” they replied. 
Jesus wept.     John 11:32-35

Why is Jesus crying? Is he unsure if he can bring Lazarus back? Did he not expect this? Did he think he had more time?


No. that’s just not it. But then what? Why?


This is all wrong. That’s why.


It was never meant to be like this. They created, they made, they brought it all into existence. All the tress, the flowers, the creatures, the people—especially the people. Made with image, made with soul, but not for this. Never for this. This just isn’t what they had in mind when creating. Separation is never what they have in mind. They made to be with. They made to have life.


All this ruin, this loss, this ending. No, this was never meant to be.


And so he cries. Cries for their loss. Cries for their pain. Cries in spite of the fact that he will bring Lazarus back. He cries because he knows—he knows they will all need to be brought back. Death is a ruiner, a separator, an ender. And yes, yes they had created, but it was not for this. This was never meant to be; never like this.


And he cries because this is why he came. To stop this madness; to put an end to the ending. Death must go down, it must be stopped. All this sorrow, all this pain of people losing people—it moves him deeply; troubles him in the soul.


He cries because he is dying to stop the dying.


Everything else he has seen: the legs that won’t walk, the eyes that no longer see, the skin that isn’t as it should be, all the healing he must do and has been doing. He knows that all of it is just this in disguise. It’s just this hinting at the corners of life. The ruin of death is the problem, because it was never meant to be like this.


And when it’s done—the crying and the rising; when it’s done Jesus says the words.


“Take off the grave clothes and let him go.”          John 11:44


These are the words we live for. These are the words our souls need. And this is why he came. To bring us all back; we all need bringing back. This was never meant to be—this dying and separation. But this is what is. So he comes. He comes to cry with those who lose what never was meant to be lost. He comes to take off grave clothes and let us go.


And that is what was meant to be.



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